Feature Request: Dating the Right One Thanks to My Useless Data
I have a potentially million-dollar idea — and, admittedly, a personal interest in seeing it developed sooner rather than later.
Many of us have spent months or even years talking to ChatGPT. Over time, and with our permission, ChatGPT can understand things that traditional dating apps could never learn from a few photos and a short bio: what makes us laugh, what we value, how we communicate, what we need in relationships, what we absolutely cannot tolerate, what kind of life we are building, whether we have children, how much independence we need, and even the patterns behind the people we tend to fall for.
In other words, we are generating an enormous amount of seemingly useless personal data.
What if — with explicit, opt-in consent — we could actually use some of it to find someone genuinely compatible?
The idea
Create an optional ChatGPT Dating experience where users who actively choose to participate can allow ChatGPT to build a private compatibility profile based on information they specifically authorize for dating purposes.
Instead of matching people primarily through photos, location, age, and a handful of interests, the system could look for deeper compatibility:
- Values and relationship expectations
- Communication styles
- Emotional availability
- Lifestyle and routines
- Parenting and family priorities
- Independence vs. togetherness
- Intellectual interests
- Humor and personality
- Long-term goals
- Attitudes toward intimacy and affection
- Conflict-resolution styles
- Non-negotiables and boundaries
The important distinction: users would never see each other’s ChatGPT conversations.
ChatGPT would simply say something like:
“There is someone within your preferred age and location range with whom you have a 91% compatibility score. You share similar values around family and independence, compatible communication styles, and several interests. Would you both like to be introduced?”
Only if both people consent would a connection be created.
Why this could be different
Dating apps are very good at answering:
“Who do I find attractive?”
They are much worse at answering:
“Who might actually fit into my life?”
ChatGPT potentially has something traditional dating algorithms do not: context.
Not because it knows everything about a person, and certainly not because an AI should decide whom someone should love, but because people naturally reveal their priorities, contradictions, preferences, humor, hopes, boundaries, and relationship patterns through conversation.
The AI would not choose a partner for you.
It would simply help you meet someone you might never have found otherwise.
Privacy would have to be the foundation
This should only exist as a completely voluntary, explicit opt-in feature.
Users should control exactly what information can be considered for matching, be able to review or modify their dating profile, and leave the matching pool at any time.
Private conversations should never be exposed to another user.
The principle should be:
Use my data to understand compatibility — not to reveal my data to another person.
And yes, there is a selfish reason behind this request
I am 35, I have children, a demanding career, personal interests I actually enjoy doing alone, and very limited time to manufacture opportunities to meet strangers.
I do not want to join a running club just to meet someone.
I am not particularly interested in spending hours swiping through dating apps.
And I do not want to restructure a perfectly good life around the project of finding a partner.
But somewhere among millions of people using ChatGPT, statistically, there must be someone whose life, personality, values, humor, emotional maturity and expectations would fit remarkably well with mine.
We just have absolutely no way of finding each other.
ChatGPT potentially could.
So please consider:
ChatGPT Dating: Dating the Right One Thanks to My Useless Data.
Because if I have already spent this much time telling ChatGPT who I am, the least my useless data could do is help me find a decent man.
Thank you for coming to my extremely serious TED Talk.